Dealing With Unmet Expectations and Dissapointment

Remember a few weeks ago when I wrote this post, Managing Your Emotions w REED? Turns out, I've been doing it wrong all these years, ha! But It's ok, I still think it has been is effective because it helps me to realize that my feelings do not dictate my decisions. This method helps me to recognize my feelings, understand why I am feeling them and then logically look at the facts and choose to act in a way that is pleasing to the Lord. I find the actual REED method below to be highly useful as well.

Scope Ministries REED:
R Recognize:
Recognize your emotions, ask God to show you what you are feeling.
E Express:
Express your emotions to God, He already knows them (I'm so mad I could...).
E Evaluate:
Evaluate your emotions in light of God's Word.Are my emotions in charge? What do they reflect about my beliefs?
D Decide:
Decide to replace your thinking and behavior with God's Truth. What does God's Word say about this?


This method can be found here:Scope Ministries Store (not affiliated).

I do find this to be quite helpful because it can lead you to the emotions you are feeling, why you are feeling them and expose false truths you have been believing. Then you can expose those lies and fill them with God's Truth.

Lately I have been dealing with some disappointment in my life and I have been examining why I am feeling downcast. I am so grateful I have this method to show me that I do not have to be tossed to and fro like the waves based on my emotions but I can stand firm on God's solid Truth and feel comfort knowing He is my Rock, I can choose peace and joy. I know when I stand on Truth the feelings will eventually follow and I will find my joy.

¹⁴Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. ¹⁵Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. Ephesians 4:14-15

Thank you for reading. 

Grace & peace,

Adoring Family

Manage Your Emotions Using This Method : REED

This is something I teach all of my children in order to help them to recognize what they are feeling and to deal with those feelings in a healthy way. I hope to teach them that the feelings will come and it is important to recognize those feelings and lean into them, feel them and then let it go. This exercise was profoundly useful to me during a very difficult time in my life. I used this acrostic to help me manage the emotions that could have overtaken me.

The method is called REED. It is an acrostic that stands for Recognize Examine Express Decide.

Recognize:
what emotion am I experiencing right now.
"...why so downcast o my soul..." Psalm 43:5

Examine:
Why am I feeling this way?
"...search me o God and know my heart." Psalm 129:23

Express: 
Tell The Lord why you are feeling what you are feeling and ask Him for the wisdom and help to overcome.
"Hear, O LORD, my voice when I call; be merciful and answer me" Psalm 27:7"

Decide:
Make the conscious choice to leave it in the Lord's hands and trust that He is working all things out for the good of those who love Him.
"...Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." Psalm 43:5

An example of this is last week I was feeling down. I'd just seen my brother the day before. We talked about how he is going to be traveling the country for the next year. I was sad for a good part of the next day. I never took the time to examine my emotions or deal with them. Eventually I took just a couple of minutes to try to understand why I was experiencing this sadness using REED.
Recognize 
What am I feeling? Sadness
Examine
Why am I feeling this way?  My brother will be gone for a year! 
Express
 My brother is a very deep part of who I am as a person and it will hurt to not get to see him. I will miss sharing our coffee inspiring yet challenging conversations and getting his perspective on things (usually very different from my own but somehow the same). 
Decide. 
Ultimately I prayed for The Lord to out a hedge of protection around my brother, keep him safe, take care of him and his girlfriend and being them home safely to us. 

I felt better after this. I explained to him that I was feeling down because I knew I wouldn't get to see him for a year.  He said he like to focus on the positive and enjoy the good times we have together. I told him I like that as we'll buy sometimes it's good to recognize our emotions, feel them, deal with them and move on. He agreed. 

I hope this will help you to manage your emotions in a healthy way.. Praying this post gives you hope and  help. 
Grace & peace,
Adoring Family

Mood Boosters For When You Are Feeling Down or Overwhelmed

With all of the change going on in our lives lately I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed and even a little down at times. I miss the comfort and security of my old home and routine. I absolutely adore my new house and I feel like I am finally settling in but sometimes it takes me a minute to adjust to a big change. Some of the things I have been doing lately to boost my mood are gravitating toward the things that brought  me joy in the past. Spending time alone with the Scriptures, journaling the things I am thankful for, listening to familiar music and watching familiar things help me greatly. I have compiled a list of things you can do to help you if  you are also going through big changes.

Right now:

Light candles, open widows, drop some bergamot in your diffuser and put on some light perfume (my favorite is (Soft Perfume Oil from Amazon).

Listen to tunes in the major key. Upbeat music is proven to lift your mood.

Wear something comfortable and cute; fix yourself up. You will feel better if you feel like you look nice.

Smile. Even if you don't feel like it. Just sit there like I am right now as I type this. Make the corners of your mouth turn up in a smile. Studies have proven that just the mere act of smiling will bring your mood up.

Clear your space. Do one thing that will make tidying up easier. Is it unloading the dishwasher so you can then load all the dirty dishes? Is it making your bed and tidying up your room? Just do one thing and it will get the ball rolling to creating a space you can be happier in.

Chew gum. Studies have shown that chewing gum relieves anxiety and reduces stress. The scent of the gum will also be a pleasant mood booster.

Drink a kombucha, the polyphenols, antioxidants and beneficial bacteria are known mood boosters.

Journal. Write down exactly why you are overwhelmed and what is bothering you. Pray for wisdom and rest in the Lord.
"Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why are you disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God" Psalm 43:5.

Daily:

Doing these thing on a daily basis will help your outlook to be peaceful and cheerful. 

Exercise. exercise releases adrenaline, endorphins, dopamine and serotonin. All natural ways to increase your positivity and reduce stress. These will also improve your sleep quality.

Eliminate sugar and processed carbs. These create highs and lows in your mood while also making you feel sluggish. 

Create Gentle, peaceful routines. These routines will help you feel secure, comfortable and to subconsciously know there is a steady rhythm in your daily life.  

Take a B-12/folate supplement if you find you are low in these areas. Calcium is proven to help with PMS induced depression.

 Drink Miracle Tree Tea. Miracle TRee Tea is filled with nutrients and antioxidants that are proven to help with depression. 

 I do hope some of these suggestions help you if you are in a season of change, if you are feeling overwhelmed or if you are down. Praying blessings over you today.

Grace & peace,

Adoring Family